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Hey, Tay.

First: You want Maureen to be happy, right? Awesome goal. But your posts suggest that you think she is NOT happy. Tay, you have to assume that she is happy with Jeff, even though her choices may not be what you want for her. I am unsure that you have successfully separated that from her because of the intense negativity between you and Jeff.

Second: Do what you want Jeff to do. Cease communication. If you receive an email, delete it. Don't read it. It's curious to note that you 'check' Maureen's blog; you even went to her new livejournal. Obviously you still care for her, but - this could *look* like stalking, especially the way you've laid everything out above. I'm not so sure that was a smart idea. Let her go from your heart. Yes, it's difficult. Break off commuication, delete her emails and her bookmarks, and move on with your life.

Third: Don't play the game. OK so you had some fun and wrote the lawyer emaail; then Jeff had fun with you and called your bluff. Stop playing the game; stop toying with each other. Who's manipulating who? Seems to me that both sides are. Rise above the pettiness and move on. Dont' keep stooping to his level by playing at e-fisticuffs. Right now you can't have her back, even as your friend. Maybe you aren't supposed to, maybe it's for the future, or not.

Fourth (and finally): Assuming that you have not breached your moral standards, you can't fight this one back; if he in fact did frame you to her, you're in checkmate. An evil and devious mind is at work. Like you said, the end goal has been reached, and you lost. It sucks. I am saddened it had to happen this way. So let it reinforces the above - delete her from your life and PC and go on with Taylor's life. When and if she realizes the truth about Jeff, who knows. Right now, we don't.

- Mero

PS Are the emails kept private or public?

that is a seriously twisted situation. hopefully something will seep through this guys wall and maureen will see the truth.

cheers to you for not chucking a brick at his head... yet.

that really sucks. if it makes you feel any better, i have been in the same situation myself, but the other end, i was the "maureen". I had a psycho boyfriend. he would read my emails, check who i called on my phone, i had to even delete when my friends called me, or my ex-boyfriend nate, becuase he was obviously scared that i would run back to him. when i wanted to see my friends, he would have to go with me and when he went to see his friends, he would make me come with him. i never had any minutes alone, and if i did, it was like he'd be back in like a half hour. then i tried to break up with him and he wouldnt let me, he would say he would delete my papers and stuff (he made me write my papers and stuff on his computer, couldnt use mine, he thought it was some excuse for me to cheat on him... i have to go to my room and write a paper) or since he hacked into my computer, he would delete my journal, or would throw all my possessions out the window or burn them if i broke up with him. One day, i got the guts to say see ya, especially since all my friends stopped talking to me, i was so depressed, i wanted out. So, finally, i made sure all my stuff was sercured and headed out, after a few large scratches on my car and a fight, and a few missing months in my journal... but at least, i was able to see what was going on, and maureen probably will someday, but she has to realize it on her own. my friends were telling me for months and months that this guy was psycho, but i liked him, so i sort of ignored it, and when my friends no longer initiated contact with me, i started to get really depressed. and the same will happen with maureen sooner or later, hopefully sooner than later, but no one can tell her, she will have to realize it on her own. well, anyway, i hope she realizes it before she marries this douchbag!

You are a good man Tay. I am glad you didn't lash out or get petty over this. You have shown that you truly care for her despite the fact that she probably doesn't want to talk to you ever again.

When it comes to breakups, there are two kinds of people in the world. The first kind wants you to die a miserable lonely death while the other wants you to live a full healthy happy life. You have shown time and again you belong to the latter. I wonder if Maureen will ever have the freedom to choose the same.

I don't know her and I can't judge her. But I sure hope she realizes what it means to have you as a friend.

You know, Taylor.. the first time we met was almost seven years ago, and I've been following your website since the days of the Mini Cooper. I don't comment often, but I read whenever possible and I've come to know you even if on this indirect level.

You really don't deserve any of the treatment you're getting from Maureen and this guy she's seeing.. You're way too good for that. And not perfect, but modest. I think it's really unfair that Maureen is not putting a stop to this behavior of Jeff's and that instead of approaching you frankly about the e-mail thing, she blatantly blamed you to the entire world.. That's not cool..

I really respect how you've handled this so far, and I'm really sorry all the pain she's caused you.. I've always looked up to you, as a web designer, a musician, a comedian, and a friend. Even though we're not the closest, we managed to still keep vaguely in touch over the years, and I appreciate that. Just know that if there's ever anything you need, I'll honestly do whatever I can to help. And I don't mean that like the cliche.. I'll really be there.

I hope everything works out.

Thanks everyone for your thoughtful responses. I'd most like to respond to Mero's comments.

First: You are right.

Second: Fair enough. I disagree on the fact that reading a public livejournal once in awhile is stalking, but yes I should cease communication too. I really have let her go in a romantic sense (which I suppose isn't being negated) but I suppose again you are right, this whole thing wouldn't be a big deal if I just let go of trying to be friends.

Third: I agree, I poked the fire once or twice as well. I'm glad that you put some of the blame on me, I was trying to present an accurate account.

Fourth: You are right.

Thanks for the valuable thoughts, much appreciated.

ps. If you mean you're emails, they are public if you don't leave a website. In the future just leave a blah.com address if you don't want your email revealed, and feel free to lmk if you'd like your current obscured as well.

Thank you deadheart, kelstar, chi chi, and lisa.

I really don't think I would have gone through with this whole posting if my name hadn't been brought up publically on her lj. I felt the need to retaliate and tell my side.

Taylor,

[second] You're right, reading live journals is not stalking. My concern was/is in your presentation: it *could look* like it.

Be cool.
Mero

"If you've read this far your either Maureen, Jeff, or actually interested in my silly life." You forgot Kitta, who's pretty much tired of Jeff and hopes he gets some help soon.

I would keep a copy of the emails and any other evidence of the harassment just in case he starts to try and attack your character at school or work, if that happens then you should think about seeking legal advice. He probably won't go that far, but sometimes people are so bored and they have nothing better to do then make other peoples lives hell.

Apart from that, I'd ignore him, Maureen is a smart girl and hopefully she'll smell his bullshit soon.

.....eek.I read the novel.
That is a very complicated situation buddy. Kudos to you, on how you stayed very calm and humble.
I wouldn't know what to do if I were in a situation like yours. I'd most likely retaliate ....and then cry. =( But that's just me.

Wow what a drag, my advice is let it go, Jeff is wacked and try to leave Maureen to see the truth herself eventually. If she knows you at all she knows your heart, if she doeesnt its not worth it.

i feel like making an 1100 mile trek and kicking that kids ass. what a stupidhead. hes obviously super insecure and i just dont see how their relationship will even last with him not trusting her. plus shes a sko for thinking you'd hack into her email. geeeeeeez

I realize I may be late in the game here, but seriously ... what the F.

This Jeff guy is a psycho! I've been on your end of the psycho-ex's new boyfriend thing, and it doesn't get any easier. It's hard as hell to say adios for good, but once you do, you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner to begin with.

Delete her from your phone, from your IM lists, email, bookmarks, etc etc etc. Just act like she doesn't exist, especially if she's going to let this douche-nozzle do that.

To Clear Things Up...
http://www.livejournal.com/users/_insideout/4036.html

Get over yourself Maureen.

And Tay, as much as you like the girl, she is clearly blinded by her feelings for Jeff. I know it sounds like a cliche, but let her go. If she ever wakes up to herself (and her boyfriend), she may once again be your friend. If she doesn't, then it is not worth the hassle.

Ad.

Sounds like a royal douche, dude. Forget him. Besides, we all know that you don't have any 1337 h4x04 5k1llz anyway.

I come across your web site by searching Trillian 3.0 because I made it and I am obsessed with praises about it. you got good graphic design here and, Anyway, I found it surprising that you like birds and lots of birds and you like to list every aspects of your life in point form, which I do too. And then I realize that we have very close birthdays since I am addicted in horoscopes. Sorry to hear about this news. I had a similar experience on this similar day, and I am able to get over it 4 weeks later, that means now. I hope you can do the same. Good luck. Adios. :)